Escape 2 Create 2014

This time last week, I was sitting in the scrappy shed at North Shields, well, scrapping!! 

Here is a round up of my weekend.. 

For me I think it was one of the best yet, but I say that every year. 

 Loving my mug!! I've used it a few times since I have been home, but really should pop it with the others. I have accidentally put one through the dishwasher once, it's not quite the same now. Those who know me well, would know that I'm a bit silly like that! 

 The shed! All decked out in gorgeous colours!! It's MINT!!! 

 Lots of detail in the hanging thingies!! 

 Champagne, a happy me, although Champagne and I aren't the best of friends, it goes straight to my head. Say no more. 

 Our table names!! Love that we are all pre-seated so all we have to do is arrive and sit! No worrying about getting the spot you want with the people you want! Love this aspect! 

 Two of the loveliest ladies! Meredith and Amanda welcoming us. Meredith is ever so good with the mike… 

 Getting ready to settle in and scrap.

 The yummy food that we ate. This exceeded all my expectations.. YUMMO!! 

 A mango dacquiri (spelling is wrong) Oh well. These were so yummy, I'll be stock piling mango for a couple of months before next time. The best little cocktail in town!

 The shed open, it was lovely and warm one night, so good to let the fresh air in.

 THE RASKOG!! I won this in the prize draw.. I'm really so so happy with this, I just can't believe it's mine!! Yippee!!!! 

The beautiful Celeste. I've followed her on Instagram for quite a while now and how fantastic it was to get to know her a little bit over the weekend, to talk scrapping and her fitness journey too!! A most motivated woman. And modest too!! LOL!! 

One scrappy doctor! I loved Natalie too, what a fantastic person. Achieving great things in her professional career and also her scrappy life. Works very hard at both. And has a husband and two littlies as well… Loved meeting Natalie!! And loved her class!!! 

Gina!! So so nice to meet her finally after seeing her around on FB and Instagram too. Gina was very nervous, but taught us fantastically and also such a creative person. I hope that we helped to calm her nerves in some small way, I felt so bad that she felt so nervous, I just knew she would be fine.. And she was.. We all loved her class!! I most certainly learned lots! 

Celeste teaching. A natural on the mike too! 

Mardi, I love you!! LOL!! I've always loved Mardi and was so excited to know she was coming again. Yes!! Mardi was sitting at the table behind us and every time she walked past me, gave me a little touch on my back!! I loved it, there's something about Mardi, let me tell you!!

A table of creative goodness. So so glad that Kate was able to come too, I didn't spend heaps of time talking with her, but I loved being able to wander over and have a little peek at what she was up to, Kate is also special to me as we both have a Heartkid, and she helped me more at that time than she'll ever realise. She'll forever be special to me!!

 I didn't get a photo of Kim teaching, but we also had a fantastic class with her. A gorgeous mini album and a project life spread. Two for the price of one. Kim drove across the country with her husband and daughter to be with us, a mammoth effort really. All the teachers travelled a long way, but to drive is huge, I know I would much rather hop in a plane, although it sounds like they made a little family holiday of it. I was horrified to learn that her husband and daughter stayed at the Pier Hotel, nice food and a good atmosphere on a Friday night when there is live music but to stay there, no way!! Another lovely lady, I didn't get to speak to her much at all, but am very thankful that she came for us. FOR US! It's a crazy thought. 

Another dinner. Too good. Really.

The mess, also fantastic to just leave things where they lie for a few days, and just trot off to bed and know that you can pick up in the morning where you left off.. 

Table buddies. My sister in law Anele, Liz, Celeste, Gina, Natalie and Me! Pretty cool table if you ask me!! Heehee!! 

And a top view of our table… 

A wonderful weekend, with such a beautiful group of women, I laughed and I cried, fat ugly tears when it was almost over. I felt emotional, probably the most emotional I have felt at a retreat so far. Connecting, re-connecting, talking, scrapping, admiring others work, dancing, eating fantastic food, drinking perhaps a little too much alcohol, but just filling my cup. It really does fill you right back up and help to remember who YOU are. My hugest thanks to Meredith and Amanda for yet again exceeding expectations, and basically arranging this weekend, putting so much into the behind the scenes so that we can all refill our cups.. 

Hurry up mini retreat. I want to go again!! 

x

Heidi Swapp

The most fabulous two days! 

A while back Liz and I heard that HEIDI SWAPP!!! was coming to Adelaide, so we booked, it seems like such a long time ago now, and then it was upon us before we knew it!! 

I love how Liz described her, the P!NK of the scrapping world!! I do love that description!

A bit of a photo journey coming up of our little trip!! 

SUNDAY!!! 

After landing in our little hire car! It was so nice to have our own set of wheels... 

Can you tell we are a bit excited? 

Off to Marion.

I love Sumo salad so got a nice big one!!! Mmmm!! 

We had a great time having a little shop around and a catchup with Lauren for some Churros and I had a huge sundae! At the new hot chocolate place in Marion, I'm bad with names so can't tell you what it was called! 

Mmm, Vietnamese Chicken!

Had a lovely dinner with Liz, Amanda, Meredith, Nat, Mardi, Tatum and Lauren on Sunday night, and this passionfruit cosmo nearly knocked me over! Twas yummy though!! Potent!!

The salmon special was to die for! I think I was the last one eating, I savoured every mouthful, or perhaps I talked too much instead of eating, either way it was delicious!! First time I had ever had fennel and I can say I would most certainly include it on my shopping list one day! 

MONDAY!! the day!! 

Lord knows I love a selfie and here is one after I had gotten ready to go to Heidi and Kims classes.

My yum brekky.. I only ate about half... 

And after a bit of a hiccup, seated, and ready to Make Pretty Stuff....

Two of the most gorgeous ladies at work during Heidi's first class... 

The beautiful lady at work.

A duck selfie just for Amanda, because I just know she will love it!! LOL!!

I loved using the colour shine sprays... Learnt so much!! 

And yes, I am here, and I think I'd better make the most of it!! 

Kim's gorgeous Christmas Class... 

I've never really been into Christmas scrapping but this year I can feel a change. 

And of course lovely Nat, who is always in my thoughts... 

The most gorgeous funny lady Meredith, her laugh is infectious, and I just think she's fabulous!!  

My special friend Liz, I'm so glad we went together and have been getting to know each other these last couple of years. She's got a wisdom about her, and I find it calming and grounding. I loved our time together in Adelaide!! I hope I can offer her some good things too!! So so glad we got to experience Heidi together... 

This sweet woman, what can I say, I really feel like I am getting to know you more now, and it's a great thing!! Mwah!!! 

Ahhh, lovely Lauren, the sister of a friend that I adore, and I adore this sister too!!! 

Mardi!!! I just love her! Haha!! That's my scrappy crush coming out!! But truly, what a most gorgeous woman! Down to earth, welcoming, lots of lovely things about Mardi.... 

Heidi telling us her first story, she had me in tears, infact it was all I could do to not break right down... What a wonderful storyteller.. I had not one idea that Monday would be so so good for my soul in more ways than one. In a creative sense but also in the sense of my spirit too... I wish I could have recorded her stories.. Thankyou so much Heidi!!! 

And Heidi and I!! It's right at the end of the day, and I'm not looking my best, but truly how starstuck to have a photo with her!! Yes, I am!! She's so lovely. And honest... 

All the EP girls with our aprons and Heidi and Kim, how cool that they popped them on straight away!! And a fabulous happy colour too!! 

All in all, what a fabulous day. 

I learnt so much in different ways... 

I can't wait for Heidi to come back again, I for sure will bend over backwards to go....

Be kind to each other, but most of all yourself. 

Forgive because life is too short. Whether you have to forgive yourself or someone else. 

Life is too short to hold onto that. The days can be long but the years are short and before you know it another 10 years will have passed... 

What a great experience... x

I live my life in thirds...

Today we farewelled hubby. 

Took him to the airport again.

And it occurred to me that we all live our lives in a cycle of thirds. 

Two thirds of the time me and the kids on our own.

One third with Brenton home again.

And then the cycle starts again.

I almost wish we didn't move back here.

Because then I wouldn't remember what I had been missing.

But now we are here, I'm sure that I can never go back.

Even though I know it would probably be best for the family.

We weigh up the pros and cons.

More cons than pros to moving back.

More pros than cons about staying here.

And so it goes on.

Suck it up princess. 

The day he leaves is called Black Day in FIFO/DIDO communities. 

I know why.

I feel it.

I never wanted to know why. 

But I do.

SO it's time yet again to buck up, be grateful.

And I am grateful. 

So many people I know are going through the shittest things. Ever.

Sick and dying children, cancer, marriage breakups/problems, mental health stuff, trying to have babies, getting pregnant then losing that precious life... So much shit. 

I've been going to the gym for the last nearly 7 weeks twice a week, for personal training with my gorgeous friend Kathryn. 

Who knew? 

That I'd like it? 

That I'd love the challenge?

That I like to push it a bit? 

That I like the rowing machine?

I didn't know I'd hate the crosstrainer. But I do.

I like the weights.

Thank faff that we've only been put on jacobs ladder twice in that time. Hate that sucker.

A new and positive part of my life. 

I even went on my own one day because K was sick. 

If someone had of said to me even two months ago that I would walk into a gym on my own, I would have said NO WAY!! So I'm a little proud. And I feel stronger.

All good.

We got a puppy 4 weeks ago. 

He has driven me insane and made me fall in love with him all at the same time. 

But I have a feeling he's going to be a good boy. 

But man, he's crazy at times. 

He picks on the girls a bit, especially Lexi. 

Likes a little nibble. 

And we have never not had stuff on the floor... Not anymore. 

We love him. Lots.

And of course a selection of photos... Not in order... 

Rocco, the day after we got him. He climbed up my arms and sat behind my neck. I'd like to see him try and pull that move now.. lol.

Father's Day family selfie.

Before we went into the Adelaide show.

All the nieces and nephews on the Macca side.. Love how the big ones get in too and even smile! Bless em!!   

Almost 2 weekends ago, Lexi woke up on the Sunday looking like this.
She had been bitten by something on the Sat, hence the bandaid, but the bit caused a reaction. Not good.

Rocco going for his first walk with Mia. He doesn't like walking! 



And Rocco's first night with us. Crazy town for a while there.
Hold on, it still is!! 

First visit to the beach, he loved the water! 
And it was such a nice day.

Thanks to anyone that calls in.. 
I always feel like blogging when I'm a sad sack. 
Oh well...
xx

Peaceful...

It's been a while, but here I am. I think Facebook and Instagram has really played a big part in me not having a big urge to blog much... I get my 'things' out there pretty quickly on both mediums and feel like I have not much more left to say. It's out there in the photos I take and the pages I like on fb and the comments I make... 

But I do have things to say, and this is my place to say them. I'm not sure who even reads this blog or indeed if anyone does. I'm not sure I'm bothered either way, I guess I could make it private and write whatever the hell I like, but I feel that if I leave it open, I at least will write things with a little bit of censorship. I am also worried about who will read the things I write. Maybe I could start a totally anonymous blog and really let fly. Bride stripped bare style! LOL! No, I couldn't do that. 

Today I have been doing a little soul searching. What do I want? How am I going to get it? Who am I? 

Why do I let other people affect me so much? (this is my main thing)

I am feeling a bit as if I'm not important to some people... And that's ok. I was upset at something Friday night but it ended up being a good thing as it fuelled me to look at ways I can feel better about myself and look for ways to make that happen.

So, I had a cry Friday night. I was feeling frustrated. I miss miss miss my husband. Would I feel better if he was home every night? ABSOLUTELY!!! But it's just not that easy. I would love my husband to be home every night, just it's just not gonna happen anytime soon.... Unless we move again and I can't face that for various reasons. Unless it's the tropics, tropics I can do. If my husband was home every night that is...

A little while ago I read one of Tatum's blog posts about goal setting, and it really resonated with me. I'm a bit of a bumbler, I bumble through and never really sort shit out. So today, after feeling so crap last night, I decided that I wasn't going to let what others do make me feel like shit anymore. I guess I really am an insecure type of person. If you are a friend of mine reading this, I'm not sure if this part of me makes it to the surface... Or does it?

I made a big list of things that I want to change or remember about life. 

Things like... 

reconnecting with old friends and connecting more with new ones.

get more involved. with Kindy, with school.

be a good role model for my kids.

stay out of other peoples drama or it'll become my drama.

make good choices and lose the guilt.

enjoy and take control of this parenting journey.

get outdoors more, in the garden, down the beach on a shitty day, just to feel the air on the skin.

be grateful and AWARE of what I do have.

don't worry about people who don't worry about you. touché

set limits for myself on social media. It can be a life sucker.... 

exercise.

don't eat what I don't need.

that I don't have to be happy all the time.

control what I can, let go of the rest.

and to also start making goals to become an SSO sometime next year. (that's another brainstorming session)

So all these and more are written on a A4 sheet and stuck above my bed, to remind me of who I am and what I want to attract in life... 

I am ok. 

I think of my emotions and my life as a rollercoaster, there are ups and downs. When I feel down, I just know there is an up around the corner, and THAT is what keeps me feeling ok. And I am who I am. Sometimes that depresses me. I look at other people who 'have' it all 'together' but in my heart I know that we all struggle, and we all could be kinder to each other and to ourselves.

Phew, who needs a therapist, you just need a blog!! 

Anyways.. Onto things that are making me happy lately... 

Rainbows.. Enough said.

Crafty kids... 

   

A jumping kid.

Lemon and garlic on roast veg. Too good. Try it. Roast lemon is really good!

A dolphin swimming along as I walked... 

My chicken noodle salad.

 Looking forward to this book landing in my mailbox this week.. 

Crocheting all these squares together, feeling kinda proud.

And some wisdom just for me. Come with love and I'll love you right back. 

Today's rainbow.. I do love them. 

I'm out of here. Are you like me and totally overthink things? Are you trying to make yourself feel a little better? There's so much to be grateful for, it's a matter of seeing it... 

xx

Week 2

Well, here I am at the end of week 2, and I've kept up the walking weekdays except for yesterday when Mia stayed home from school. I thought I could ask one of my parents to come up and stay with the kids while I went out but they were both busy so it didn't happen. Doesn't matter though. I had a pretty crap day with the kids, Mia should have gone to school, and next time I'll send her with a note to say that she can come home if she's ill. Not keep her home and then discover that she isn't sick after all. The girls have been bickering quite a lot and I found myself on Wednesday feeling exhausted. Crazy exhausted. And then the motivation slips, and then yesterday I didn't really care that I didn't go for a walk, but I think if I had of it would have helped me to feel better. I just feel a bit out of whack. Missing Brenton being here of an evening. Two years of FIFO and I still get down about it all sometimes. Some parts of me wish we'd never left but a huge part of me is happy that we are here too, but feel like I'm not being the best Mum I can be, just overwhelmed with it all at times. When the motivation is high, all is well, but when things slip, (and my motivation waxes and wanes and I don't even know why) it all goes a bit astray. And that's when I start to question everything. 

It's going to be my birthday on Monday. I think as an adult I just get less and less excited about celebrating. I'm certainly not worried about ageing. That doesn't bother me at all. I feel I'm a much better person in my late 30's than ever before. I like myself alot more. And having my little family is a big part of that. 

Brenton is home in 5 sleeps. We are supposed to be going camping while he is home over the long weekend. I hope the weather holds out for us. A little bit of rain is ok, but not buckets and not much wind either. Too much to ask for? Ok, I know I'm asking too much but it's been 5 months since we have gone, so I think I'm allowed to beg Hughie for some good weather. (Hughie, for those that don't know, is the fantasy male figure who controls the weather!!) (Have you heard of him?)

Other than all that, I've been cleaning, crocheting little bit of gardening and watching copious amounts of Offspring. I only have 3 eps of Season 3 to go and then I'm caught up to the new Season which sucks because then I'll be waiting for weekly doses. I need to find my copy of Season 1 to lend to a friend, who knows where I've put it but I haven't forgotten my friend if you so happen to read this!! 

Happy Friday and hope you have a good weekend. I'm off out Saturday night which is a welcome thing. A night without the kids!! Yay!! One time when I went out, my Mum bought them back at 8:30 the next morning which I kindly asked NOT to happen this time. I need a sleep in. And I probably won't sleep in at all, but I just need a little time to myself. Although I must say my fantasy is getting a sea view room at the Lincoln, crocheting, vodka, room service and a couple of good movies.. LOL! 

Til next time. 

Walk

This week I've been walking. 4 days in a row and tommorow will make it 5. I'm going to walk 5 days a week. I've said it. Not quite out loud, but it's out nonetheless. 

I've been watching from the sidelines proudly as my friends get fit and go running or go to the gym.. I haven't been happy with myself that I'm just not doing anything.. 

What's that saying? 

If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.... 

(or something like that) 

Or my favourite..

I'm not even sure where I found this, maybe on Facebook perhaps on pinterest. But I do like it. I can fantasise about a better me all I like but if I don't change things, things won't change. 

So from now on, I'm not going to over think this walking everyday, just going to get out and do it. I still have Lexi's pram and seeing as she's still a pipsqueek, I know she will happily sit in it while we get out there and walk on the days she isn't at Kindy or at Nanna and Poppys place. 

I am one of those women who wonder who is watching me, of making a fool of myself (and yes, to friends of mine, that particular statement might be hard to believe) and feeling intimidated (in my head) of other more capable people... but I am ultra self conscious... I wear the same sorts of clothes, and do the same sorts of things all the time. Because I am comfortable with that. I have been comfortable for too long. I self sabotage all the time!! Not long til 40 now, time to get the skates on. When I build up a little bit of confidence I wouldn't mind doing some work on my upper body.. Not sure about the tuck shop lady arms that are happening, and I like feeling strong and capable and lately I feel myself weakening...  It's a sign of getting older perhaps. Hard to accept when you still feel like you're about 20!! That's what keeps me feeling positive about ageing, is that I still feel young (maybe act too young) 

It's all about confidence really... I just want to feel good about myself. And some days I do and some days I don't. But I can say that I'm feeling pretty good this week. Eating properly (without over thinking that too) and walking. I can feel myself walking taller already. 

How are you? Are you walking tall? 

x